About Me


Jon Cordova here AKA the Smartass!

Being this damn smart all my life has proven more of a curse than a blessing. Going through life as one of the cool kids forced me to mask my smarts…real good. I mean, do you know what it is like to be cursed with this brain?

No…you probably don’t.

As a mechanism to deal with dumbasses, I have always tried to use humor in everything I do. And when I do, I have been able to (successfully) entertain the layman dumbass.

I mean, you’re reading this right now and you’re entertained, right?

I was the baby in a family of five. To get rid of my smart ass, my parents sent me outdoors, to break windows and raise a little bit of hell — heck for those of you offended by cursing.

In college, I had a solid C- GPA average — go me. Always the student of consistency, I maintained this stellar average for my five full years.

So where I am now?

Well, after coasting through my college years with my somewhat below average GPA, I landed my dream job. For the past 25 years, I have been complacent, lazy government slackass. I have a fat salary, funded 100% by your hard earned tax dollars. (Do you feel stupid yet?) My claim to fame? Performing just well enough to keep my job for 26 years. That’s it. And, as a professional slackass, I was even able to convince Uncle Sam to pay for my master’s degree, (Nailed it!)

Now, reborn and sort of taking myself seriously, I am looking to establish a NEW way of doing things, I actually want to work for my money, as opposed to take yours. I now am a co-owner of a company Valkeryie Consulting along with the world famous Ms. Lowball. We do Social Media Marketing, Social Media coaching along with a host of other thing and are a franchise owner of Social Owl software. I hope I can entertain you and also give you some sound advice.

But, of course, if you still have questions, that’s what this form is for!

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